Proud to have Autism

I wake up in the morning, turn on the educational cartoons, and the boys decide to keep it on, turn it off, or change the subject. We eat breakfasts, sometimes together, often as we go on with our individual wake up routines and grounding strategies. By mid morning we are either in a social activity with people outside of our family, or running through our retention drills.. math charts and spelling manipulatives with 'D', math manipulatives and language charts with 'A'. Then we often play outside, or indoor games before lunch. After we gorge, we usually are looking for more social opportunities, or quiet learning activities (usually the latter). Then we are looking at science activities and environment investigations (home, outside, or personal interests). By late afternoon we are looking for games, ipads, computers, whatnot.. errands or outdoor play. we often eat dinner in two sittings which may be a problem, I don't know but it can be an inconvenience, bath time and hygiene routines occur here.. then they horse around and play together before we listen to music and watch some calm and pleasant cartoons. Slowly, rooms are then tidied up and linen changed while they come up with all these needs that must be taken care of before bed. Sometimes there are late bedtimes, often for one of the reasons above, usually to do with picky eating, missed routine, or wellness consideration.. but its not a big problem. If they can't sleep right then, they will eventually.. usually after catching that missed routine they will sleep...

To be autistic is said to be 'more' .. more happy! more sad :( .. more easily frightened, and often quite shy. When autism parents are faced with typical challenges, they usually get advice that intends to 'maintain-control', or manipulation strategies that encourage more adult-friendly and socially-tolerable behaviours. Rarely is there support that addresses the issue of a child being 'more'. When we look at a child who is feeling more intensely than we expect, it triggers shock, anxiety, and other distressful reactions in the people around them, it often seems unprecipitated, overreactive, or spirited. If you think about the reality that this happens in our lives anyway, perhaps less often, but we do know how to overcome our own stresses as adults, you become more capable of handling autism. When we get past the label, it is easier to see the child.

'Auties' or people with a sensory disorder usually experience their 5 senses in a different way than people sometimes referred to as 'neurotypical'. Imagine a person who has blindness, in many cases their other senses are compensated, and thereby heightened. If I were a neurologist.. I'm sure this would be easier to explain or describe, but as a parent and person with similar experiences in this area, I will say it like this: when one area is triggered, the others may overreact to the environment or in a way to correct itself. Sometimes it is hard or impossible to say which way it will go, often behaviours can be different depending on the senses, and the responses of the rest of the body. Over time and through getting to know an individual, being with a person who has a sensory disorder becomes predictable and manageable. Two terms fall under this part of the autism lifestyle: Sensory diet and sensory profile.

Whether its with professional support, or informally done at home, each child with a sensory challenge has sensory accommodations.. a sensory diet is designed to address the child's specific needs effectively, so he can be less impacted by frequent disruptions to daily routines by his/her nervous system. A sensory profile is a checklist that is then calculated to determine the child's true needs through behaviours they exhibit on a regular basis.

The key to understanding autism (I think) is to realize that our nervous system can send similar messages to the brain, from overwhelming sensory input, as it would physical pain. This is why a child can seem like they are reacting to something as though it is causing them pain, some may be able to demonstrate more specifically than others, in more generally understandable communication strategies, and others react as profoundly as a young child having a temper tantrum. Part of the therapies these children receive, is to help them adapt, communicate, and develop tolerance to these stimuli. Triggers, as briefly referenced to above, can be sights, smells, sounds, sensations, or from internally by digestive issues, lack of sleep, headaches, stress, anything that bothers the average person, can be traumatic to a person who has an autism spectrum disorder. In many cases children develop, grow, and overcome these challenges as they age, but often times not 'enough' without intervention at pivotal points in their development, these can often be looked at as when the child achieves growth from toddler to preteen, or from tweens to teens, and teens to adults. Usually at these points, there are services available for the most challenging aspects of growing up.

Now you may be wondering, or asking yourself (and probably others at some point!) what can you do to get around this challenge while developing connections, friendships, working relationships, or providing care for a person or family with autism.

• Don't be afraid to ask questions. 
• Be yourself.
• Offer positive reinforcement and encouragement, criticisms, judgments, anything with any sense of finality can often be negative.
• Acknowledge and Accept that what you see, hear, smell, sense, or notice may not represent their 'normal'. 
• Know that Autism is a communication and social handicap. Social can mean anything from sorting out 'empathy', anxiety disorders, and stress intolerance. Communication does not mean ability to use language in written, verbal, or electronic means, but to express thoughts, emotions, and ideas. 
• Many people with autism experience the old-fashioned idea of 'left-brain' tendency.. they tend to process their surroundings differently, desire different outlets for creativity or recreation, or simply have differing learning styles.
• All children with autism DO grow and develop, but at delayed rates to typical children. (for instance, my youngest was assessed as being developing at 41% of the pace of typical children the same age).
• NO TWO AUTISTIC CHILDREN ARE THE SAME. There are many interventions and strategies available for kids and adults alike, and they are often tweaked and customized to the individual, and rarely are they (exception being in non-specialized programs such as public school) taught exactly the same. What does occur, is similar symptoms at similar degrees of severity are addressed the same, and this shows the most consistent positive and swift results.